6/22/2008

Girly Clothes and Babies

I have abandoned this blog since last winter. I have concentrated on political blogging and personal family blogging about my one-year-old grandson. I just returned from a baby shower for my second daughter, Michelle, who is expecting a girl at the end of August (the family calls the baby Penelope). My third daughter, Rose, is expecting a baby the beginning of December. Five of Michelle's friends who were at the shower have babies, so I had wonderful discussions about babies/careers/husbands.

I noticed that Michelle's baby got many more pink girly clothes than the young feminists of my generation would have felt politically correct to give to a friend's baby. I am not a fan of pastels for either boys or girls. I did adore the red fleece smocked dress she received. I have always bought books, music, and dvds as presents. Since my daughters were about 8, I would never have the audacity to select clothes for them.

I was not a clothes mommy and I will not be a clothes grandmother. Penny's 3 aunts and I chipped in for a state of the art baby carrier. I also gave her a Rosemary Wells's first Mother Goose, Peter, Paul and Mommy, and Woody Guthrie's Songs for Mother and Child.

6/18/2008

Smashing Gender Stereotypes

If this morning in the playground is any proof, every kid in Chelsea (boys and girls) has been yearning for this stroller. It doesn't have princesses, only butterflies. It is wonderfully lightweight, easily fits in the bottom of the stroller, can be lifted by one adult finger. Because it is so lightweight, it blows around the playground which amused Nate. He was generous enough to let at least 10 separate kids play with it. There is a little back basket, where he was depositing all the stuff he picks up in the playground. Gum is his new fascination.

At least consciously, i did not set out to break gender barriers; that was my only choice at BuyBuyBaby. The lucky baby is the sea otter puppet Patricia got Nate for this birthday. Nate particularly liked giving dinosaurs rides.

Pink Princess

Ecstatic at the Beach

The Glories of Sand at Jones Beach

6/04/2008

Divergent Thinkers



Some parents have asked me why I feel so passionately about preschool psychiatric diagnoses when my own daughters didn't have such serious problems. I will let you in on a secret. Bright, creative children can have a terrible time adjusting to traditional American grade schools. Bright bored children don't finish worksheets, don't pay attention, daydream, forget assignments, leave books and homework home, ignore the teacher, read ahead of the class and miss their place if called upon, miss many days of school. My local school insisted on testing a kindergarten boy for development disability; his IQ was genius level. When my writer, pictured above, was in first grade, her teacher refused to assign her to the advanced reading group until she was more "cooperative and compliant."

Rose never became compliant. In kindergarten she refused to do assignments because "writers use their own words." In high school she refused to do art projects because "artists paint what they need to, not what the teacher assigns." Now I would be told to have her tested because her "emotional maturity" lagged behind her intelligence. My two high school valedictorians were not given any awards from grade school. They only truly liked school when they got to Yale.

Your bright preschooler might face as many challenges as your friend's autistic or ADHD son. More schools have special ed services than have gifted services. Again and again, I questioned whether home schooling might be easier than my daily struggle with their school. Younger parents might not anticipate the extent to which they need to be advocates for their kids in American's test-obsessed schools. Getting high test scores is more important than being a gifted musician or artist. Kids who don't adjust to the norm are stimatized. The most creative, divergent thinkers our society desperately needs can be slapped with a psychiatric label and have their giftedness drugged out of them.